Not Quite What I meant

I was mostly speaking in a personal way. Who do I go to.... For instance, one of the things I've seen in advice columns....Guy writes in, says he has several female friends, but not 1 of them wants to be more than a friend....and he's wondering what he's doing wrong, why he can get female friends, but not romantic partners. The columnist usually responds with 'ask your friends to give you an honest evaluation....ask them how you can improve yourself and make yourself more interesting (appealing) to your target audience'.... I saw a variation of that a few days ago (male sub with female dominant friends, looking for a dom/sub relationship), and it got me to thinking....what do you do when you do want an honest evaluation, and your friends just tell you nice things, things they think you want to hear....things that won't hurt you, but also things that won't help you change or grow. I mean, if I'm all that and a bag of chips....why can't I find the relationship(s) I want?