I'm indecisive this AM.

What Your Cute Monster Says About You

You are both a realist and an idealist. You're able to see the world as it is - and how it could be. You dream big, and you never give up on your beliefs. You have big plans. Your inner demon is depression. Sometimes you build things up in your head. People think you're cute because you're determined. You're a fighter, and that's charming.

The Cute Monster Test

What Your Cute Monster Says About You

You're the type of person who stands out in a crowd, even when you're trying to blend in. You are honest in your character and appearance. You don't pretend to be someone else. Your inner demon is sorrow. You tend to get depressed easily. People think you're cute because you're rebellious. Your uniqueness is charming.

The Cute Monster Test

Blind Date

I think if my friends were the matchmaking type, this would have been talked about, if not accomplished by now. www.astrology.com Today ask a friend to set you up on a date. As scary as it might seem initially, this may be the best move to make. Your pals know you and your type best. Let them play matchmaker and see what happens next.

Halloween @ Scary Carys

We're not having a party this year. We've had them several years now & it's just been too much effort for too little return. It's funny...I've had people be upset with me because we're not having a party...and these same people have never came to 1 in the 1st place. Um....huh? Rik's theme for the yard is Evil Clown Circus (think Killer Clowns from Outer Space). If you want to stop over Halloween Night to see things in full swing, you are more than welcome to. We will be VERY involved in the whole trick or treat thing (over 400 people last year)...so don't expect an overwhelming amount of hospitality & social niceties...but we would be happy to see you all the same. :) If you want to stop over some other time during the week, let me know & I'll see what we can work out.

Dick-Sion-Airy

Go to www.urbandictionary.com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the FIRST definition it gives you. (SIDE NOTE - I picked the most amusing definition, not the 1st) 1.Your name: Heather - Another of a popular name in the U.S. such as Ashley, Jessica or Amanda. Personality of a Heather: outgoing, happy, loud, fun, down to earth But: can be bitchy, rude, ignorant, and sometimes has the urge to please themselves with household items because they are sexually active. "Don't be such a Heather" (bad heather) "Heather is such a peaceful name" (Positive) 2. Your age: 38 - A gun ,muh-fucka. "Walking my dogs that shit on ya lawn, I fertilize a whole farm when it thunderstorms, I carry weight, .38's in the waist, Battling me is like .38's in Kuwait." -Redman(KING) 3. A friend: Bruce - He lives in your pants. He's very popular with ladies. He's two feet long. When he gets up you have to whack him off until he throws up. Bruce I know she's hot but not now wait until later. 4. What should you be doing? : Sleeping - To masturbate furiously in your room while praying that your grandma doesn't come in. GET OUT GRANDMA! I was sleeping. Those were sleeping noises grandma. 5. Favorite color: Purple - Extremely potent marijuana, specifically marijuana buds that have a purple hue to them. Also accompanied by a fragant, usually fruity smell and mad perma-grin. Yo, you gotta come over and smoke, boy! I got the purple! 6. Hometown: Lansing - The state capital of Michigan and its 6th largest city, with about 100,000 residents and declining. It is a typical Rust Belt Community. It was the home to Ransolm Olds (Oldsmobile) but the plants have skipped town or closed all together. Lansing is next door to Michigan State University in East Lansing. Due to the presence of the University and the state government, the Lansing area has a more diverse population and economy than the rest of Michigan. Lansing is a good area to live as far as the rest of Michigan is concerned. 7.Month of your birthday: July - Someone from Spanish ethnic calling a person a liar. You said you were gonna take me out for margaritas & tacos but you didn't show up. July to me Julyer! 8.Last person you talked to: Rik - (v) to get as close as possible to physically raping someone in plain clothing, preferably jokingly, and with little repercussions. Dude, i totally Rik'd that chick. Yeah, man, i saw, you were all over her and she was like "agh!" 10. Your nickname: Heat - Heat has several meanings as a word and one as an abbreviation. Heat as a slang term is commonly used to describe a weapon of some kind, usually a pistol. "You packing heat?" Heat as in heat generated by an exothermic reaction is an increase in energy of particles causing them to move/vibrate more rapidly, in some materials this can cause electricity to flow more easily, for materials to melt then evaporate. When an animal "goes into heat" they are at their most sexually active and reproductive time of the year, this would usually occur during the "mating season" of the particular animal. As a military abbreviation, HEAT means High Explosive Anti Tank. This is a rocket or other explosive missile/shell designed to penetrate through a tracked vehicles armour before detonating it's explosive charge to disable/destroy the target. (For those of you wondering, there is such a thing as "low explosive") "Hostile armour spotted, load up a HEAT round, let's take it out."

Thank you Freyaschild

*Use the 1st letter of your last name to answer each of the following with ONE word... They have to be real places, names, things...nothing made up! Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial. 1. What is your last name? Cary - Derekin 2. 4 letter word Carp - Dike 3. Vehicle: Cadillac - Delorean 4. City / Neighborhood: Carmel - Detroit 5. Boy Name: Clark - Dean 6. Girl Name: Caroline - Darlene 7. Occupation: Chef - Driver 8. Something you wear: Corset - Denim 9. Food: Cheese - Dumplings 10. Found in a bathroom: Clippers - Dove 11. Reason for Being Late: Crash - Drunk 12. Something you shout: Crap! - Damn! 13. Animal: Crane - Donkey 14. Body part: Cranium - Derriere 15. Word to describe yourself: Caring - Delicious 16. Foreign Country: China - Denmark

All Together Now in the Key of C

Jingle Valia, Jingle Valia,
Jingle all the way.

Jingle Bells
from the Christmas Song Generator.

Get your own song :

How oft at Christmas-tide the sight
Of green Valia gives us delight.

O Christmas Tree
from the Christmas Song Generator.

Get your own song :

Peace on earth and mercy mild,
God and Valia reconciled.

Hark The Herald Angels Sing
from the Christmas Song Generator.

Get your own song :

There won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time,
The greatest gift they'll get this year is Valia.

Do They Know It's Christmas
from the Christmas Song Generator.

Get your own song :

Radical Honesty #2

Radical Honesty – How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth Brad Blanton PP. 92-94 Telling the truth means all of the worst things you might imagine it means. It means telling everything you have hidden that you have done in the past to the very people who you think would be most hurt or angry or surprised or embarrassed by the revelations. If, for example, you have been having sex with someone other than your spouse, you have to tell him/her all the details: who you did it with, how many times, who came first, how many times you came, where it happened, whom you told, what you said to each other, how much fun it was, and so on, and answer all the questions that arise from the telling. Telling the truth means telling all your secrets and your secret feelings to whomever you don’t want to tell. Worse yet, it means being expressive of feeling – mad when you express resentment and warm and moved when you express appreciation and silent when you don’t yet know what you feel. Telling the truth has to do with being expressive of feeling and using descriptive language regardless of ideas about tact or propriety. The first thing you have to get over to tell the truth is politeness – modification of your report of your experience out of "consideration" of the other person’s feelings. That is, unless your spouse gets a clear feeling from your report of how much fun it was when you fucked his best friend, you haven’t told the truth yet. Honest people speak simply, using language more to describe than to evaluate. Liars evaluate almost exclusively, only using enough description to make the story believable. Good liars use a little more description that bad liars, more subtle in its cast of value so the listener things she came up with the idea about whether what happened was good or bad. Hours and hours of practice and observation have helped us all in developing our ability to manipulate in this way. We all have a sales pitch about the nature of reality. When a person chooses to make the transition from habitual lying to telling the truth, the passage is scary and difficult. We have learned to assign value dishonestly and pitch our point of view with everything we say. We have been trained by scores of moralistic authorities, like Nurse Ratchet in Ken Kesey’s One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, to keep our mouths shut and behave as we should instead of speaking the truth. We have been blackmailed into a common interpretation of reality by hundreds of male and female Nurse Ratchets. Learning to describe, to speak what is simply true, requires an unlearning of hard-earned preconceptions and a relearning of how to perceive with as little preconception as possible. Knowing the difference between perception and conception and getting good, through practice, at distinguishing between the two can save your life. Both the quality and length of your life can be increased through learning to focus on making the distinction over and over again between value-laden words and descriptive words. Descriptive words make pictures happen in the minds of the speaker and the hearer, crate experiences like sexual excitement, anger, righteous indignation, embarrassment, sympathy, sadness, joyfulness, or laughter. An honest person is one who is creating vivid pictures, feelings, sounds, and smells in the singular attempt to portray what has occurred or is occurring within her or around her. An honest person is concerned foremost with accuracy. Being honest is not just for the sake of feeling good about being a virtuous person; it is a vital necessity. Learning how to be honest and being willing to do so is the cure for all non-environmental stress disorders. It is the key to managing the disease of moralism. It is the most worthwhile focus of our attention as humans of this time and the only thing with half a chance to save us from ourselves. This is vital to your life and to the survival of life for all of us. Our problems do not arise from not thinking enough before we speak. Just the opposite is true. The way we learn to think and modify what we have to say before we speak kills millions of us unnecessarily and lays waste most of the cripples left, injured but still alive.

Radical Honesty #1

Radical Honesty – How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth Brad Blanton PP.55-58 Manipulating and strategizing and having secret plans and conspiracies is one way to operate in the world to create the appearance of a successful life. But the appearance of a successful life is to a successful life as the menu is to a meal. The appearance of success is a performance in which you are cut off from contact with the audience except through your role. A successful life, in contrast, is one in which you can share with others openly, as your life happens, without all that rehearsal. The contrast is between performance and sharing. The alternative to telling the simple truth about your feelings and thoughts, as they occur, is a kind of pathetic bragging one is left with in later life even if one has made money – the usual measure of success – but remained an isolated manipulator. Manipulation never works to get the result desired, but it always seems like it’s just about to work. When you get what you said you wanted by manipulation, it is never enough. When you tell the truth and get what you want, getting what you want is like gravy – it feels like you are getting more than you ever hoped for, rather than just oaky but not quite good enough. We all get to make this choice between manipulation and communication over and over again in life. John Stevens, a Gestalt educator, wrote beautifully in his book, Awareness, about the dilemma of trying to win love through manipulation as opposed to communicating. A great deal has been written about trust and love, and that if you can build a strong trusting, loving relationship, then people can be honest with each other. I believe this idea is exactly backwards. It is very nice if I feel trusting and loving toward someone, but if I don’t feel this way, what can I do about it? Trust and love are my feeling responses toward another person, and these responses cannot be manufactured. Either I feel love or I don’t. All the emphasis on trust and love results in many people pretending to feel trust and love "because it is healthy, and will bring about closeness, honesty, etc." – adding a new area of phoniness and dishonesty in their behavior. Honest, however, is a behavior and is something I can choose or not choose. I cannot decide to love or trust, but I can decide to be personally honest or not. And when I choose to be really honest and say what I experience and what I feel, I am showing that I can be trusted. This is the only kind of behavior that can bring about a response of trust. Trust is my response to a person that I know I can believe. Even if I dislike a person, I can trust him if he is honest with me, and I can respect his willingness to be himself honestly. Likewise, honesty does not always bring a response of love, but it is absolutely essential to it. When I am honestly myself, and you respond warmly and with caring, then love exists. If I calculate and put on a phony behavior in order to please you, you may love my behavior, but you cannot love me, because I have hidden my real existence behind this artificial behavior. Even when you love in response to my phony behavior, I cannot really receive your love. It is poisoned by my knowledge that the love is for the image I have created, not for me. I also have to be continually on guard to be sure that I maintain my image so that your love does not disappear. Since I have shut myself off from your love in this way, I will feel more lonely and unloved, and try even more desperately to manipulate myself and you in order to get this love. In contrast, when I am honestly myself and you respond to be as I am in that moment, I can receive this fully and know the satisfaction of being really related with you. This honest relating is not always joyful or pleasant – it is sometimes sad, sometimes angry, etc. – but it is always solid and real and vitally alive.

Are you serious?

Maybe I'm just old. Or too strait laced. Or closed minded. Or....sane. I had been talking to H S, a woman from from CollarMe for a few days. And by talking I mean IMing, a little bit over the last few days. I'd say the sum total time would be....2 hours. Most of it inconsequential, insubstantial. Most of it her trying to represent herself as a much more significant person to me than she is, and me being blunt, honest, and well.... SANE. Holy fuck! I am not going to announce to the world that you are my collared slave. I am not going to be pleased at you calling yourself "my woman." And I sure as hell am NOT going to ask/tell you to move from New York to California and be my TPE slave. Really....do people honestly do that...move thousands (hell even hundreds) of miles away from their established life to be with a total stranger who they may or may not have a successful relationship with? Really???

Thinking

www.tarot.com Thursday, Oct 9th, 2008 -- Today it's your turn to step outside the box. It's easier now for you to entertain a relationship with less of a commitment, for you are feeling more emotionally secure. Exploring your passions can lead you in unexpected directions if you have the courage to remain open to change. Communication is the key that can open the door to love, but you cannot hold on to what you once thought was true. www.astology.com Thursday, Oct 9th, 2008 Be patient when it comes to love. Not all affairs start off perfectly. Relationships of all kind take work. If you want your next romance to last, be willing to lay down a stable foundation first.

I've met him. Repeatedly.

Just Like Me

Bought it tonight. Pay for it tomorrow morning. Receive within 2 weeks I hope. http://cgi.ebay.com/LEATHER-CORSET-SALE-Steel-Boned-Renn-Pirate-LARP-Wench_W0QQitemZ120313136610QQihZ002QQcategoryZ11522QQtcZphotoQQcmdZViewItemQQ_trksidZp1742.m153.l1262

Pointless Meandering

I've been wondering lately what's going on with the laws of attraction with regards to myself. It seems that of the 5 women (that I know of) who have been flirting with me for a while (or who actually have some real interest in me), 4 of them are under 30. Prior to my ex-wench, I hadn't dated people who were more than a year or 2 younger than me, and I only recall 1 person before her who was significantly (10+ years) younger than me who was interested in me (I was 27 she was 17...that went absolutely nowhere). Why & how did I become so interesting to people in their 20's within the last 2 years?