(sigh)

You ever just want sympathy & consolance....and instead you get cold practicality?

Thoughts from my Seminar

I can't remember if I mentioned that I was attending a seminar on "Managing your Emotions Under Pressure"....I think I did when I was talking about my goals. Anyways....behind the cut is some things I took from it, things I can hopefully focus on, remember, learn from and grow better because of. In every one of your conflicts, you are part of the conflict and you can be part of the solution. Change takes 3 weeks to 6 months before it feels comfortable and normal. Baby steps to change = success. Stop letting the disparaging voice in your head talk to you into not making a change. If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you have always got. Repetition is the key to learning. No one can make you feel anything. You have to consent and agree to the feeling. You control how you feel and react to any given event. You control how you interpret any given event. You are responsible for your past and your future. E + R = O, Event + Response = Outcome You’re in charge if you want your life to change. When we place blame, emotions are attached to it. Depression, guilt and sadness = blame of self. Anger = blame of someone else. Anxiety = blame the way that the world works. 100% = All. There is no more than 100%. You can’t give or do more than 100%. Negative = bad. It hurts you to think and believe that something bad is good. If you had to physically pay (broken/missing body parts) to make a person or situation be everything you want them to be, is it worth the price? Is it worth it to let someone else have power over how you think, feel and react? How bad was whatever happened, really? Is the situation the worst thing that could happen in your life, short of death? Must, Should, Have to, Got to, Need to, Ought = 100% Imperative Requirement. These words often have someone else’s values attached to them. We are demanding that the world works the way we want it to. The world won’t think, act, feel, or believe the same way that you do. Do you want to be right or be happy? Sometimes when we choose to be right, it causes more pain, frustration and problems than if we had chosen to be happy. QTIP = Quit Taking It Personally. Most of the time, it has nothing to do with you. Facts and evidence show that situations are not always what we first perceive them to be. We get upset when we expect or demand someone to behave a certain way and then they don’t. A person behaves however they want to. All we can control is how we choose to feel and react. Why are you going to give someone else power? If you change what you do, might you get a different outcome? We teach other people how to treat us, by how we treat ourselves. Do not let one person or event effect how you see yourself. If 99 people you care for think that you’re great and 1 person that you care for doesn’t, that does not mean that you have suddenly changed into something bad or unlovable. When you give your energy to something, be sure it’s worth it. Be who you really are and do what makes you really happy.

(cough)(cough) Ma, May, Me, Moe, Moo

Kermit The Frog - The Rainbow Connection Why are there so many Songs about rainbows And what's on the other side Rainbows are visions But only illusions And rainbows have nothing to hide So we've been told and some choose to Believe it I know they're wrong wait and see Someday we'll find it The Rainbow Connection The lovers, the dreamers and me Who said that every wish Would be heard and answered When wished on the morning star Somebody thought of that And someone believed it And look what its done so far What's so amazing That keeps us star gazing What do we think we might see Someday we'll find it That Rainbow Connection The lovers, the dreamers and me all of us under its spell we know that it's probably magic. Have you been half asleep And have you heard voices I've heard them calling my name Is this the sweet sound That calls the young sailors The voice might be one and the same I've heard it too many times to ignore it it's something that I'm supposed to be Someday we'll find it The Rainbow Connection The lovers, the dreamers and me

Things I've done that you might not have

1. Had a lesbian dominatrix be the official at my wedding. 2. Been kissed by 1 professional wrestler & propositioned by another (both events over 5 years apart). 3. Had sex with 21 different people in a 9 month span (almost 1/2 my life ago). 4. Been the official at a close friend's wedding. 5. Given a brand to a relative stranger. 6. Performed in 1 capacity or another for a Rocky Horror Cast for 7 years. 7. Heard several ghosts speak, in a graveyard. 8. Had sex on the front lawn of a church, near midnight. 9. Manage to go for years, with people I see several times a month, not knowing what my real name is.

Support, and I don't mean hose....

Monday - I had made up my mind that I was going to join Curves, and I was already a week into trying to monitor my food intake. So, shortly after I got into work my boss, the VP of HR, gave me a bag of Dove Chocolates. I'm pretty much the Keeper of the Candy (and other munchies) around the Administration department. If you want chocolate, I probably have some. If you missed breakfast or lunch, I've probably got granola bars, crackers or chips. SO anyways....I politely handed my boss the bag of candy back, and told her that I am not being the Candy Pusher at this time. I am trying to lose weight, and I don't think having a bag of chocolate in my drawer is going to be helping towards that goal. So....she took it back & has it in her office now. Later in the day, there was a birthday cake for someone in Admin....and I politely turned down having a piece. I got asked 3 times, and all 3 time I said "No thanks", loud enough that the other people in the gathering could hear. Several people looked at me like I was nuts for turning down the cake. Tuesday - I signed up for Curves last night, and was going to have my 1st workout tonight after work. I was rather proud of myself for even getting this far. I know that signing up for a gym sounds like no big deal, but for me.....someone who is generally lazy & lacking in motivation when it comes to diet & exercise....this is an accomplishment for me. SO.....now, the CEO gave me 2 bags of chocolates this afternoon. She left them on my desk while I was away delivering mail. When I got back, I looked at it, and then promptly put the bags in the community area of Admin, in 1 of the cupboards. A little while later, 1 of my co-workers asked what I did with the candy, because she wanted some. She asked loud enough that several other co-workers heard & wanted in on the Choc-Fest. I told them where the candy was and let them know that they were welcome to it. Then, the CEO and 2 other female co-workers.....all who have had (or currently HAVE) weight & diet issues in the past....proceed to laugh at me & tell me that eating some won't kill me. "If your on Weight Watchers, it's only 1 point!!" I politely demurred and said that I didn't want any. Then 1 of them harangues me about how if I just deny myself "everything" that I won't be able to keep the weight off once I lose it. I told her that I do eat candy daily, but not to excess. I have 2 Milky Way caramel bites in the evening, and 3-4 cookies at lunch....as well as just my usual diet.....popcorn (butter or cheddar), pasta, sugar cereals.....so it's not like I'm "denying" myself. I'm just refraining from going overboard with it all. It's all about the serving sizes....I don't need to scarf down 1/2 pound of chocolate throughout my day. My husband....supports me. He's also doing the 'serving portion only' diet, as well as exercising daily at home. But....I'm not at home with my husband for the bulk of my day. I'm trying to go with the adage of "Lead me not into temptation....I can find it well enough on my own"....but I feel like none of my co-workers are taking me seriously.....It's funny though, when other women at work have been on diets in the past, most of the other women there would congratulate them and offer them support when they needed it & pats on the back when they reached whatever their goals were. For me though....bags of candy, laughter & pressure.......and all I want is a little support.

Weight Update

I lost 4 pounds last week. I started using DietPower.com. Basic gist of it, is that you keep a daily log of what you eat & drink, and how much exercising you do. You weigh yourself every morning, and when you log in for the 1st time each day, it asks for your weight. When you set it up, it asks for your starting weight, what your goal weight is, and when you want to reach your goal. It then makes a graph showing your daily progress on 1 line, and your projected progress on another line. I have definately become more cognizant of just how much I am eating every day, and am making an effort to just eat whatever a portion is (IE-3/4 cup cereal w/ 1/2 cup milk). It's interesting exactly what qualifies as exercise. Driving, reading while sitting, desk work, walking around the office, dressing/undressing, grooming (hair, makeup, brush teeth).....just me living my life...I burn an average of 1,000 calories a day. Unfortunately, I take in an average of 2,000.....so it's not exactly balancing out. And I joined Curves for Women today. It's less than a mile from my house, right on the way home. Their hours are kind of wacky, they're open M-F, 8:00AM - 8:00PM, with 2 hours off for lunch, and Saturdays 8:00AM-11:00AM. SO.....unless I can haul myself out of bed & be functioning before 10:30 AM on Saturdays, all my workouts will be in the evenings, on my way home from work. They recommend going 3 times a week, and their circuit training takes 1/2 hour. I don't forsee any immediate problems with committing to 3 times a week. Right now, the only time I can't (won't) go would be Wednesday evenings, and the occassional Friday evening.

Commonly Confused Words Test

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